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Below are the 17 most recent journal entries recorded in Single and Free's LiveJournal:

Sunday, January 3rd, 2010
4:45 pm
hoping someone out there is alive

i am hoping to find other single ladies (preferably ) in my area. so i can have people to hang out with.

my current friends drive me crazy with either their constant need to be in a relationship, or their love of smoking and drinking

needless to say i am not fond of being around people who smoke, drink,  do drugs etc.

i just want friends for good clean fun.

Wednesday, November 11th, 2009
6:29 pm
Research opportunity for individuals not involved in a romantic relationship
Are You Between The Ages of 18 and 23?
Participate in a research study investigating the attitudes of persons not involved in a romantic relationship. Specifically, this study aims to discover the role that personality traits and cultural values play in single persons’ attitudes towards and behavior in dating relationships. This is a short survey that should take you between 15-45 minutes to complete and all of your responses will be anonymous!

Please follow this link to take the survey:

Tuesday, November 10th, 2009
3:57 am
(knock knock) Hello? ... Anybody home?

I myself have mixed feelings about being single. It's one thing to be single when you're  young and have plenty of friends to back you up. It's way different when your last college class was during the Reagan administration and most of your friends live elsewhere. Though I know better than to think my ideal partner will come riding to my rescue on a silver stallion (who's gonna clean up all that horse poop anyway?). As for settling, I've been there and done that. Never again.
Saturday, April 16th, 2005
10:05 pm
There sure aren't very many entries in this "Single and Free" group. I just wanted to say that I'm newly single. I read the description of this group, and knew this is where I wanted to be! So, let's have at it.

What is this community all about?
Here's an idea:
#1 We are a community of Live j'rs who DO NOT feel the need to be in love or attached to a significant other in order to feel whole.
#2 We feel the need to work on our inner self rather then cope and deal with lonliness in a co-dependant manner.
#3 We do not have the time, tolerance or patience for a significant other in our lives at this time.
#4 We are not all "bitter" or "Burned" we just know that Love is a full time job and not all it's cut out to be.
#5 We dont believe in romanticism, but more so realism.
#6 Most of us do not believe in "Love at first sight"
#7 Most of us do not like feeling pressured, hounded or tied down by a clingy partner, the mere thought makes us angry or scared.
#8 Most of us believe life's too short to spend the best years of your life heartbroken and hurting over others who have lied, cheated, abused or misled us in some way. We want to have fun and be able to do things on our own terms.
#9 We understand how much it hurts/sucks to be heartbroken, hold compassion for those who are experiencing it and dont ever want to feel that way again.
#10 We are SINGLE, NOT AVAILABLE, N/A, and wont settle for less.
Friday, February 4th, 2005
10:46 pm
I like it this way
Being single's pretty fun. I like being choosey. I like using my noodle. I like being in the company of male FRIENDS. It's amazing how much you learn about the opposite sex when you treat them like human beings and not prey. Being single means I don't have to worry about another person. Realtionships take work and effort. I respect that a lot.. and enough to know i don't feel like putting forth that effort and sacrifice.

Funny being single and liking it is hard to explain to my friends. But nothing's worse than cruising through the mall and having your friends get all depressed at all the "Happy" couples. How do we know they're happy? After all, who knows what goes on behind closed doors?

Either way, i like my life.

Current Mood: chipper
Wednesday, March 24th, 2004
10:27 pm
I'm Renya, and I'm getting bloody sick of people trying to hook me up with someone, or telling me I have "commitment issues" because I didn't feel my last (three month) relationship was working out.  >_o  I am perfectly content all on my own right now.  I just moved out into my first apartment on my own.  I work full-time at a job I love, and I have fantastic friends.  I do not need a boyfriend (or girlfriend, for that matter).  Heh.

So yeah.  Hi!

Current Mood: sleepy
Monday, February 23rd, 2004
7:40 pm
hi all!
I have been single for about a year now, but am finally living alone....its been a month. Im learning how to be alone with myself. Its nice.
I have a friend who keeps on with this on and off relationship. Ive been trying to convince her that she should just be alone and have fun with the support of her friends. She's not biting. she cant stand the idea of being without a man. I think she's nuts.
im trying to individuate and be single and date and have fun. i dont like to get wrapped up in the emotional stuff. Any advice on learning how to deal with this persistant need for company and/or intimacy? I know its normal, but i would rather have no one to lean on.

Current Mood: annoyed
Wednesday, July 2nd, 2003
7:50 pm
Ok so this is a quick entry, chances are I'll make a better one later. Ok I'm 19, straight if you want to hit me up IM me, drop me a line- by way of email of course- or leave a comment in my journal.

Chances are BEFORE talking to me you'd want to scan over my journal because I'm one weird female and you better realize what you're getting into. I'm not into false pretenses, with me I'm straight out from the beginning. I tell you everything wrong with me and the things that aren't with me. I don't like surprising people later on when they become my friend or my guy.

Honestly, I think if more men and women were honest and laid everything on the table from the beginning then things would be much simplier.

I am what I say I am in my journal. Those problems in my journal are my real problems. So if you want to get to know me go to my journal and then hit me up.

Alright, I'll make a better entry later on. For now I'm out. :wave: :P

Current Mood: groggy
Wednesday, March 5th, 2003
8:19 pm
Just wanted to introduce myself
*waves* Hi everybody

Well, what can I say
I'm 19(20 in April), in my second year at Rutgers University.

I love musicals, seeing Phantom of the Opera at the end of the month, yay!

My favorite tv shows are Buffy, Friends, and Star Trek: Voyager(yeah, I'm a dork :P)

Anyway, thats me in a nutshell i guess. Feel free to email or IM me, my SN is in my profile.
*Waves buh-bye*
Wednesday, February 20th, 2002
12:14 am
"Marriage is more than just four bare legs in a bed" -Someone
Did they put rice in the water? Maybe it was a result of Valentine's Day, the cold weather making everyone want someone to snuggle up to, or maybe it's just prime prep time for all those June weddings, but everyone has been talking about getting married. It's in my conversations, it's all over livejournal, it's on television, it's in magazines (the InStyle celebrity wedding special! I heart it!), and it's in my classes! The concept of marriage is stalking me, and the police won't give me a restraining order.

Three weeks ago someone pointed out to me that I'd been considered serious marriage material by 5 people. Yeah, it sounds like I'm bragging, but it's not like, whoa, I like you so much. It's either more like whoa, I'm scary and obsessive or whoa, you would make a great wife, right after I get through dating all these skanky girls to get my fun in.

My best friend ever is getting married in June, and I'm her maid of honor. It astounds me that I'm not the flower girl, it just seems like I can't possibly be old enough to be the closest friend of someone old enough and mature enough to be married. Incidentally, I remember when she first pointed him out to me as someone she had a crush on, the first time they had sex, and their first date. In that order.

I went home to California last weekend, and there was some family there. Someone remarked on how we rarely get together, and how maybe the next time we got together, maybe it would be for someone's wedding *meaningful glance my way* Gulp. Honestly, Now it begins. I'm going to be that quintessential single girl the family's trying to marry off, a la Bridget Jones, Cathy (from the cartoon), Rose from Titanic or that chick in Life is Beautiful.

RedHead Melissa and I are getting married-it will be a double wedding. You're invited, of course. The grooms? Oh, no. We're marrying ourselves, I promise to live, honor and cherish me, forever and every till death�kills me. Because, as she pointed out, it's really the being proposed to, the ceremony, and the honeymoon that's fun. I think that's why the divorce rate is so high, people just want to start over so they do the fun part again.

And if all fails, I have my backup, doesn't everyone? Eleven more years of spinsterhood and I will officially be betrothed to Joel Murphy, my friend from high school, and my personal life-cheerleader. Just keep taking those cold showers, Joel, only eleven more years.
Friday, January 25th, 2002
7:11 am
A book called Lipshtick
A fling is quite delicious, at least for the first week or so. If it ends there, you may walk away with some of your mental faculties intact. If it goes on much longer than that, well, then it runs the risk of becoming a relationship, to which I say, duck and cover.

That's the first thing I read when I randomly opened a randomly selected book off the clearance table at Books-A-Million. I then promptly tucked it under my arm and strolled to the cash register, quite pleased that the rather lovely feeling of knowing someone somewhere gets it came at the measly price of six bucks in hardcover.
Saturday, January 19th, 2002
4:10 am
I heart...

Making out with someone who you used to have a crush on, especially if making out with him will make someone you don't like unhappy.

Hearing other people's drunk phone calls.

Strolling into a party with thirty of my closest friends.

Roommates who get to kiss the boys they want to.

Other people thinking I'm drunk when I'm not.

Boys who will trade their adidas for my high heeled sandals for an hour.

Losing track of how many people I've kissed in one night.

Seeing your waitress from dinner at the party you went to after dinner.

Exchanges that go, "Hey, kiss me!" Long, good kiss, "Thanks." Skip away like a nut.

Drunken IMs when you get home.
Vixle: I think i hed too much'
Vixle: So I will say gppd nicght

Acting like an alcoholic slut and then telling someone you're in a different sorority.

Hugging everyone.

A coat everyone loves to pet.

I completely have to do that again sometime.
Friday, January 18th, 2002
6:48 pm
NCMO=Non Comittal makeout
I totally turned down NCMO. Good NCMO, last night. I have remarkable self-control. *neon APPLAUSE light*

I saw that guy who TJ told I was a virgin, thanks for that oh-so stellar introduction.

So, I know this guy because I randomly met him last year and it turns out he's the older brother of a pretty good friend of mine. We talked forever last night, and it was great, really comfortable, you know? We've got similar personalities and very similar views about a lot of things, except he doesn't believe that bisexuality exists. He compared it to age, "I'm not a little 26. I'm either 26 or I'm not."

That's right, he's 26 to my 19. Which seems so old, but at the same time not so old. Every time he'd start a story with "when I was 19..when I was 23...when I was 6" I'd chime in with "I was 12...16...being conceived." He's working on a second degree here at UA and he'll graduate in the spring, so I mean it's like he's a senior. It's not like he's a real grown up, he's still in college. To me, Steve seems older and he's just 21.

He just seemed, like, really slick, though, you know? I don't know how to describe it, really. He's just incredibly confident and assertive and blunt as hell. I didn't really see myself has his type, he's a little too testosterone-y, so I was completely relaxed and not all nervous around like I usually am around potential date-y kind of boys. I mean, he was flirty, but he seems like the kind of guy who is like that with everyone. But then he asked me out for an unspecified dinner date. I was surprised, and I suddenly felt like I was watching myself on Blind Date. It was so weird.

Then he leaned forward, like, he was going to stand up and I thought he was going to say, "I'm about to go," but he said, "I'm about to ask you if I can kiss you." Yay and Boo, yay and boo. Yay for nice boys who want to kiss me, boo for boys who ask. You never ask. It's so annoying. I told him so.

I left a little after that, and he got my number and a hug before I went inside. I woke Laura as I came in, "I didn't NCMO, you proud?"

It wasn't until today during Astronomy that I got the little stomach flutters that I should have had in the moment.
Tuesday, January 8th, 2002
11:23 pm
I try not to whine but I must warn ya/Bout those motherfuckin' girls from California
Somebody told this guy who was interested in dating (or perhaps just fucking) me that I was a virgin which is not anything to be ashamed of, but also not what I want to lead with. I feel like the word carries connotations that don't apply to me at all.
Sunday, December 16th, 2001
9:56 pm
I am the biggest hypocrite
I've been undeniably jealous

I have been loud and pretentious

I have been utterly threatened

I've gotten candy for my self-interest

Heaven forbid I be criticized

Heaven forbid I be ignored

I miss when he loved me, and showed it. I miss manipulating him, and testing him. I miss creating a little crisis, just to make sure he would be there to rescue me. He always did, and he's still who I think to call first when I hit a bump.

It' different, now. I'm not allowed to wake him up at 3 in the morning, sobbing. I've almost stopped crying entirely, because he's the only person I liked crying to. Going to him with problems was amazing, and he would give me this rush of love and security and it was better than never having been upset at all.

He asks me if I'm okay, but only so he can make an excuse to go with a clear conscience. He wants me to say I'm fine, because that makes it easier and simpler for him. He doesn't want to stay up with me and pat my hair while I sniffle, and he doesn't get excited when I'm happy. If I'm fine, then we can swap amusing anecdotes every once in a while, and pat ourselves on the back for staying friends.

"It's Melissa, from this summer."

That's not my fucking name. It's just Melissa. To your best friend, there should be no modifiers or qualifiers necessary. When I talk to my friends, they assume I mean you. Even if I add descriptions and last names, it's always, "You mean the guy from New York?"

I'm not in love anymore, but I still love. It's still painful, because I still love him.

But I'll be fine.
Friday, December 14th, 2001
4:03 am
Melissa starts studying for her final...2 hours later she realizes her book is at home...
Yay and Double Yay for friends who will drunkenly tell a boy I like that I am much prettier than his girlfriend.

Current Mood: happy
Sunday, September 16th, 2001
3:02 am

"Of course you miss the intimacy that a partner brings: the sex, kisses, hugs, just general physical contact with anyone. I do have a couple of friends available for casual sex but for me, there are emotional and moral complications with that� Up until now, I would not have considered having a relationship with someone I don't love but I might be able to, should a person whom I respect and have a great friendship with `come along'. Even if I don't, there are so many positive aspects to my life that I value what I do have and don't spend futile time lamenting what I lack."

Current Mood: awake
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